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June 23: Sun Quan Tells Them How It Is


On this day in 229, Sun Quan proclaimed himself emperor of Eastern Wu. There you go. That’s what went down on June 23rd. That Sun Quan, he was all like, “Hey I’m proclaiming,” and people were like, “You sure about that?” and he was like, “Yeah, I’m sure, and if you don’t like it, go on down to the Eastern Wu Bar and Grille and cry into your rice wine.” See, this is why drunk people shouldn’t be allowed to do these. I mean, they just grab the first thing that they see and, you know, just blurt it out. Then try to attach some significance. But still, that Sun Quan, I have to salute the guy. I bet he was fun to get loaded with. And if you don’t think his proclamation is worth a reason to drink, let me tell you something: I’ll bet the people living in Eastern Wu in the 3rd century thought it was plenty significant. The people over in Western Wu might have thought so too, considering he was most likely planning on invading them. Just guessing, but I wouldn’t put anything past ol’ Sun Quan.



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